Sep 30, 2010

Turn that light off!

There are no night lights in our bedroom.  The LED screen on the radio is covered.  The curtains that are backed by a second panel and also with a tapestry behind it cover the window.  No light is allowed to come through.  Why?!  Because I live with a freak!  Jeff swears that he can see light with his eyes closed.  I'm not just talking about if someone was blasting a spotlight on his face whilst he sleeps.  Of course that would agitate us all.  What he claims is that he can see even the most tiny of emulated lights through the blackness of the night.  The light on the smoke detector, that is probably 12 feet high on the ceiling, urks him.  Yeah--that tiny, teeny, dull red dot.  For added darkening, he sleeps with a shirt draped over his eyes.  Just in case that smoke detector light wakes him up in the middle of the night. And don't even get me started on what he's like when the sun is actually glaring outside.  If he doesn't have sunglasses he is NOT a happy camper.
So now we always joke that he has thin eyelids.  Like the extra set that crocodiles have.  Or that this is his super power and he could go fight crime by the light of the moon.  Though he'd probably want a new moon as I'm sure the moon would be too bright.  Hell, the stars are probably blinding to him;) 

I tried to search online to see if there was a name for this "thin eyelids" thing but to no avail.  The only thing I could find were people more freakish than my hunk of weirdness.  I'm talking about eyelid surgery!  Double-layered blepharoplasty. Not to lift and remove crows feet, but the chopping off and re-sewing your eyelids! I guess some people with smaller lid openings want to appear doe-eyed but I really can't fathom letting someone near my eyeballs with a scalpel. Eck!

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