Dec 16, 2008
but i am in the course and i love it! it's fun and its a great workout. for those of you in Tucson, you should definitely give it a try: poledancingtucson
its guaranteed to make you sizzle!! i'm gonna go soak in a hot bath now
Nov 21, 2008
I'm broke as fuck right now! Sure if I actually used cash these days I would spare some of my change and place it into their buckets. But its usually few and far between when I actually have coins or paper on me. Even if I did give, the minute I come out of another store there's a fresh new face eagerly awaiting me to reach into my pocket and when I don't, I feel their eyes burning a hole into the back of my head. I can't give to them all! I can't dole out cash to every one of these fuckers standing outside a store front. I know they are there to try to collect and help those less fortunate. But instead of me feeling like I'm helping & doing a good deed, I feel pressured and judged. I wish they weren't there. I wish if you want to give to a cause, you can go to an agency and donate; not feel bullied.
And in the back of my mind I wonder if they are legit. I mean really, how hard would it be to get a bell and a bucket. I've seen them with a white plastic bucket before. That's it! Hmmm, what a great idea. I could use the cash.
Nov 4, 2008
The hair show was fun. I gave them free reign to do what they wanted. I'm loving the color, but the cut...not so much. It's just hair--it'll grow. And maybe during the growing stage I'll learn to love it. We'll see.
The first day they decided what to do with my hair. Because it was a detailed coloring process, they did half my head that day, so that night I got to walk around with half blond with roots, and half dark chocolate with violet, red and blonde accents. I looked interesting, to say the least. The next morning, which happened to be after the Halloween party, was a bit hellacious. I'm sure I was still wasted when I first got to the show. The company I worked with did 2 shows--I had to be in both of them. The first was to explain the color technique, the second was to demo the cut. During the 1st one i almost puked all over the stage about 5 times because i felt like ass from the night before. Good thing my back was facing the crowd for the most part. After lunch was the second show and that went a lot smoother. I guess the color and cut technique I received is from their fall collection--so it's cutting edge (pun intended). I've never had a top notch 'do before! After the cut I had to walk through the crowd and let them touch my hair, take pics, etc. This is what it's supposed to look like but I'm no good at doing hair, so it only looked near this on the day of the show.
Here I am getting my makeup done--before I got the rest of my head colored and cut.
Oct 25, 2008
today i've volunteered to be a guinea pig for a hair show. today i go in for a consultation; the artist tells me what they want to do to my hair and if i agree it gets cut, colored, whatever. then tomorrow is the hair show. i'm excited and scared simultaneously. if they tell me i'm getting a mullet--then i'm backing out. sorry folks, as cool as they are i obsolutely can NOT rock a mullet. other than that i'm gonna go with the flow. maybe they'll give me a style that i never would have thought of getting myself. but maybe, just maybe, my haircut will be fugly and i'll cry. but then my hair will grow back quickly and besides--i have lots of hats and wigs:)
Oct 14, 2008
Pesto & Broccoli Spaghetti
1 package spaghetti 3 Tablespoons olive oil
1lb fresh broccoli (chopped) 3 cloves of garlic (or more!!)
1/4 cup grated parmesan cheese S & P to taste
1 cup vegetable broth (without this the recipe is dry, but still good)
~Cook the pasta in boiling water. While it's cooking steam the broccoli.
~Place cooked broccoli, broth, parmesan, oil, garlic, S & P in a food processor-blend until smooth.
~Drain the pasta when it is finished. Place in a serving bowl. Add the broccoli mix; toss to cover the pasta.
Oct 9, 2008
For the past two years I've been suffering from some mysterious thing. The first time I noticed it was when I lived in Spain. I felt like I had something caught in my throat. I was constantly clearing my throat, gargling with water/mouthwash, excessively swallowing, ANYTHING to try and alleviate the annoying sensation that was occurring in the back of my throat. I also noticed a foul taste in my mouth. So I looked in the mirror and began to do a self-exam of my oral cavity.
Some background info--my tonsils are huge. Beyond huge! They are humongoid! I've had many dentists freak out about their size. "Wow! Those are some huge tonsils!". Yeah, I know! They ARE in my mouth! My huge tonsils cause me problems. When they are sore or inflammed it almost feels as though my throat may close off. Doctors refuse to remove them.
Back to the story. In my huge tonsils I noticed some white chunky things. I began to poke and prod around. A hard, slimy yellowish chunk of thing popped out of my tonsil. It left a gaping hole in my tonsil. I immediately began to freak. I've never done an extensive examination of my tonsils before. I learned later that the hole or crypt in the tonsils is normal. But it wasn't the hole I was freaking about, it was the foreign object that was worrying me. I swallowed and looked in my throat again. Damn! There was another one! So I pushed around on my tonsil, which made it start to bleed, until that little fucker popped out too. Then there was another, and another. I first thought maybe it was food. But it had the consistency of partially cooked rice. I knew I hadn't eaten anything like that in a few days so that couldn't be it. I decided to smell it. That's when I almost puked all over the floor. Holy shit those things stink! I asked the doctor about them the next time I went in and they gave me a perplexed look, had no clue what I was talking about and dismissed my question--so I never mentioned them again.
These things come and go. There will be months that go by without any sign. Then one day, like today, I'll wake up with a disgusting taste in my mouth and that annoying sensation in my throat, run to the bathroom and low & behold I'm infested again. So today I decided to do some research. Thank you internet and the endless amount of people with their infinite knowledge:)
The things are called Tonsilloliths and they look like this:
They are a bit mysterious. From what I gather they are the calcification of bacteria, dead cells, etc. and can be caused by overactive salivary glands, infection and can be the cause of hallitosis. I've always prided myself on having decent breath. But now with the influx of this shit I'm worried I have stank mouth! I've never had anyone cringe when I'm talking to them, but I notice a distint disgustingness in my mouth when I'm having a flare-up, so what if others are noticing it too?!?!?!
At least now I know what it is. But how do I stop it? There is no cure. I wish someone would just cut these fucking tonsils out of my head! They get in the way. They are a nuisance. And they prohibit me from *ahem* the art of deepthroat.
Sep 26, 2008
Sep 5, 2008
Everyone knows I love to travel. Sure, I like the occassional roadtrip but I prefer to fly. It's faster! When I have some place in mind to go I WANT TO GET THERE. I don't like to waste a majority of my vacation driving. So you can imagine my dismay when I received an email from Continental Air (my frequent flyer airline) and read this bullshit: http://www.continental.com/web/en-US/content/travel/baggage/checkbag.aspx?camp=ADHC&campyear=2008&sender=EMAIL_MKTG&language=EN&description=Firstbag
Quick synopses: they are charging $15 for your first checked bag, $25 for a second. So if you are a family travelling with checked luggage--do the math. I usually travel light but it's nice to check a piece of luggage so I don't have to lug it around. I've had many occassions where I've had to run to my connecting flight and it's way easier without luggage in tow. Aren't they already charging enough for flights, now they have to charge for fucking luggage too? What if everyone stops checking because they don't want to pay? What the hell are they going to do with all the luggage space? Sell it to companies to offset their gas prices perhaps? I haven't looked to see if other airlines are charging for luggage. If they aren't I'm sure they will be soon.
You know, if the US had a superb train system like the rest of the world that would be a great option for travelling. But no!!!!! I can't even take a train from here to Phoenix.
So what to do? I guess I'll just complain some more and then jam all of my shit into one bag that will fit in the cabin. Look for me--I'll be one of those annoying people holding up the line as I try to stuff my oversized bag into the overhead compartment:)
Aug 25, 2008
We were driving the other day and saw a creature that made me giggle. It always makes me giggle when I see one! What is it you ask? The Geococcyx, better known as a Roadrunner.
There it was, darting across the road at full speed (but without Wil E. Coyote in hot pursuit). I've seen them numerous times since living in the southwest, but don't know much about them. So I decided to do a little bit of research. Here's what I found:
The Roadrunner is considered a ground cuckoo. They can grow up to 18-24in in length and 10-12in high. Roadrunners can run at speeds of up to 15 miles per hour and generally prefer sprinting to flying. If they are being chased by a fast predator they opt to fly.
Here's something really sweet--they are monogamous and a pair may mate for life.
And there you have it; my nerd blog of the month:)
Aug 14, 2008
Aug 8, 2008
Jun 24, 2008
One more day and we are out of here! We go to the STP concert tomorrow night and then thursday morning we hit the road:) "I can't believe you are driving instead of flying" said the naysayers. I think it's going to be a fantastic time. We are leaving Tucson, heading east towards NM. We're going to drive through Roswell hoping to find our lost alien families. Okay, so not really, but neither of us has been there so why not pass through on our way. If we find something cool, great! If not, then we know not to go back:) Then we are going to Chicago, the Bend & Chattanooga with a few pitstops along the way. Then I'm back in time to start my next school. I'm going to use every fucking cent of that GI Bill. I don't care if I have to take the most unusual, obnoxious classes to fulfill this dream of mine. haha. I'm going to miss my massage school graduation though:( I really wish I could be there but we have our minds set on this roadtrip so I can change it now. You bitches have fun at the grad & even more fun at Tens. Wish I could be there to watch the insanity that I'm sure will ensue at the strip club. And to all of you not going to see STP for their comeback tour, I'll make sure to rock out with my cock out for you. What?! You didn't know I had a dick? Fools!! Why do you think Jeff loves me so much? haha (he's gonna kill me if he reads this)
Jun 11, 2008
We were in Phx again this past weekend and went to a kind-of farmer's market not too far from my mom's house. It's an actual established building & store and is opened every day. We don't have anything like that in Tucson. We only have the kind of farmer's markets that are opened once a week. Boo! And we've tried two of them and they both sucked (though I'm sure maybe we were just there at a bad time...i have faith!). Anyways, we've been to the one by my mom's before so we decided to hit it up before we headed back home. I really, really, really wish this place was near us seeing as though it would save us SOOOOOOOO much money. Here's what we got (bear with me & the long list):
~6 little avacados
~2.7lbs roma tomatoes
~4 16oz containers of strawberries
~4 12oz containers of blackberries
~3 red bell peppers
~5 orange bell peppers
~4 granny smith apples
~2lb bag of baby carrots
~1lb broccoli crowns
~1 large head of garlic
~2.5lb bag of green grapes
~2lb bag of cherries
~4 red plums
All of this for only $23.57!!!!!!!!!!!!! This would have cost about $70 at least at a regular grocery store. Craziness!
Jun 2, 2008
I was in Phx hanging out with my mom last weekend and we stumbled upon a used book store. This place was going out of business. Fortunately it wasn't due to the huge stores like Barnes & Noble. The young guy at the front desk said the owners wanted to retire and decided to close the doors. I wish I had gone into the store before! Everything was 60% off. EVERYTHING! We easily spent a couple of hours in there, perusing the endless selections of old & newer books, all while listening to a vast collection of The Beatles:) There was this huge stack of National Geographic Magazines. I could have easily spent hours looking at all of them and even more money, but I chose just a few that really caught my attention and made me all giddy inside. The oldest one I purchased was from January 1919. It had a story about Chicago and how extraordinary and cutting edge the city was. Here's a few snipits from the magazine. Also, a few ads that I thought were nifty. Just imagine what people will think when they read magazines from 2008, in about a century.
I can't even imagine being able to buy a car, let alone a brand new car for under 2 grand. what do you think that equates to in today's world?
i saved the best for last;) see what Listerine was used for in 1919. it wasnt just your ordinary mouthwash. that shit burns my mouth, i couldnt imagine putting it anywhere near my vag as they recommend doing. eeks!
Mar 13, 2008
JEFF LOVING LIFE!
Feb 11, 2008
This is where it all began--Lackland AFB, San Antonio, TX (BMT or Boot Camp to those that only know Hollywood jargon). I was there for 6 weeks beginning Dec 29, 1997
Then I was off to my Tech School in the armpit of America--Shepherd AFB, Wichita Falls, TX. I was there for almost 6 months learning how to be a grease monkey. Next I went to my first assignment--Luke AFB in Phoenix, AZ. I spent my first 4 years there. I even won Maintainer of the Year--yay me--haha (who knows how the hell that happened).
Besides, my normal mechanic job I got to drive Hummers, big 5 ton trucks and even accompanied the radio guys up on top of the mountain to fix a tower radio (or something like that. I just volunteered for the view & to get out of work--haha)
I really planned on getting out after my first 4 years, but then September 11 events unfolded and I was stuck in. I didn't have any plans for a job or school so I couldn't get a waiver to get out. All I could do was wait. During that time the AZ Diamondbacks were in the World Series. I got to be one of the people holding the flag on the field while Jewel sang the National Anthem. It was pretty kick ass. So anyway, I waited, and waited more. Then one day I smoked crack (not really) and reenlisted--for 6 years!! Eeks!! (I think the next day I might've thrown up in my mouth a little--haha)
Right after that I decided I was ready to travel. So I requested to go to Andersen AFB in Guam and I was off. I spent 15 lovely months basking in the sun and killing my liver. It was great! I also got to witness & live through a horrible typhoon, got my boating license and went to Australia--the one country I've dreamed of since my youth.
Then I was off to cold ass Ramstein AB in Germany for 2 years. As most of you know this is where I caught the traveling bug and did the vast majority of my wandering. In Germany is where I became a vegetarian, excelled at driving a stick shift, pushed my car to over 110mph continuously on the Autobahn, tried tons of new foods that I never would have dreamed of, bathed in nude spas & topless beaches, learned how to snowboard (well kind of--haha), and somehow managed to finish my Associate's degree.
After my time in Germany, I was off to Moron AB in Spain. I spent 15 months there, both loving it and at the same time hating it. You had to live there to know what I'm talking about. Here I perfected the ability to stay up super late & party until the wee hours of the mornings. Hey--when in Rome... I also excelled at doing no work, but pretending to do lots. It was probably the easiest, slack job I will ever have in my life. And I also learned quite a bit of Spanish, though I think I've forgotten a lot:(
Then I left sunny Espana for even sunnier Davis-Monthan AFB, Tucson, AZ. When I first got here I knew I had exactly a year left until I got out. My new bosses, on the other hand, were clueless. They put me in an office job (yay no more smelling of grease & fuel). I don't think they were too happy when they found out I only had about 7 months left. Haha--got you fuckers!!
That pretty much wraps it up. I bought a house & am a little over halfway done with massage school and am ready for the next chapter. Bring it on!!
Feb 7, 2008
PUBLISHED ON JANUARY 10, 2008:
Don't pick up dog crap, and save a sea turtle as a result!
By CATHERINE O'SULLIVAN
Back when I went to college in the '80s, there was a catchphrase popular among philosophy and political science professors. If I've heard it once, I've heard it a thousand times: The personal is the political. It means that decisions individuals make in their daily lives are, in themselves, political statements.
So as we usher in a new year, I've resolved to become more politically active: I am going to stop picking up my dogs' shit.
I've been thinking about doing this for some time--mostly because I'm lazy--but also because it's the right ethical decision. At the dog park, massive amounts of doo-doos are sealed by conscientious persons via plastic grocery bags meticulously tied in knots. These bags, or doo-doo bombs, are then concentrated in garbage cans piled high with fast-food bags, soda cans, plastic packaging, more bagged doo-doo, more random junk, and on and on until the cans overflow. These semi-laminated stratigraphies of waste are every bit as awe-inspiring as they are compact, and on an anaerobic level, especially during the heat of a Sonoran summer day ... ewww, I don't even want to think about it. But, clearly, plastic-encased dog crap is not only everywhere, but underneath everything. The question becomes: How is all this shit ever going to biodegrade?
According to Alan Weisman, author of The World Without Us, it isn't. Plastic grocery bags, besides choking sea turtles who mistake them for jellyfish, are every bit as nasty as we ever thought they were, and probably worse. Oh, yeah, some of them might be photodegradable, meaning they could eventually fall apart in the sun, but when deprived of air and sunlight, plastic bags really do hang around for fucking ever. It follows that the contents therein must also.
Decades ago, plastic was relatively unheard of. Then a guy called Leo Baekeland, trying to come up with a new kind of shellac, mixed up a bunch of phenol with formaldehyde and invented Bakelite. He got rich, and we got telephones made of something other than wood, along with a bunch of kitschy shit that now sells for hundreds of dollars in antique shops down in Bisbee. The production and evolution of plastics ramped up during World War II, and by 1975, the National Academy of Sciences had estimated that oceangoing vessels alone dumped 8 million pounds per year of the stuff into the oceans. The world's commercial fleets by themselves dumped 639,000 plastic containers every day.
Then things went from bad to worse. As anyone who's ever bought a bargain brand of bottled water will tell you, some plastics do break down, but they never break down enough--polymers are long molecules--and all those broken bits of plastic containers eventually wind up in the food chain, consumed not just by sea turtles, but fish, crustaceans and even krill, tiny shrimp that feed everything, from whales to penguins to fish. The sad fact is, the majority of creatures in our oceans are now on diets heavily supplemented with what Weisman calls polymer crumbs. The extent of the damage that this modern dietary supplement is causing has yet to be measured. And when it is measured, I don't think I want to hear about it.
But back to plastic bags: They don't degrade in the landfills, and even if they manage to actually complete the trip from one end of a loggerhead to the other, they don't degrade in the oceans. Mostly, they wind up in circular aquatic garbage dumps called "gyres." The North Pacific Gyre, east of Japan and north of Hawaii, is bigger than the state of Texas and contains approximately 3 million tons of visible plastic. That's six times more plastic than there is krill in the same 1,000-mile area.
But enough about plastics. A much more environmentally friendly element comes out of a dog's ass: Dog shit, as far as I can tell, degrades fairly easily. Rain, wind, car tires, shoes, feet, hooves, skateboards--all these things are positively boffo and break it up into micro particles. After all, the stuff dogs eat is mostly organic (except in the case of my old dog Leroy, who once ate so much aluminum foil that it was extruded the next day in the form of a perfect silver turd) or at least relatively polymer-free: cornmeal, rice, animal byproducts, lamb, beef. All these things break down into reasonable-sized molecules that the environment can handle.
When you consider all this, what's the big deal about having to grab a tree branch and scrape a turd off your shoe?
Jan 13, 2008
*i promise to always wear a helmet, protective gear & not drive beyond my knowledge. i want this to be fun, not a death sentence